Far Cry
10. Far Cry
If we were to include every Uwe Boll video game adaptation on this list, we would probably fill the whole thing up with his films, so we’re giving a pass to such clunkers as BloodRayne, In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale, Alone in the Dark and House of the Dead, which manages to not even take place in a house.
That said, Boll’s 2008 adaptation of Far Cry makes the list, just in time for the release of Far Cry 5 later this month. A low-budget affair that stars Til Schweiger as a man who hunts down mutants created by an evil German doctor. To be fair, Udo Kier gives the film a little bit of life as said German doctor, but the film still suffers from incompetent filmmaking. A few years past the meagre box office success of Boll’s earlier films, Far Cry bypassed theatres altogether in 2008, except in Boll’s native Germany.
9. Super Mario Bros.
Nostalgia might trick you into thinking that Super Mario Bros. is a cheesy good time, but we assure you: it is not. This ill-conceived comedy imagines the titular bros (played by Bob Hoskins and John Leguizamo) as a couple of Italian plumbers in New York City. Long before augmented reality placed the bros in the real world, this movie had them running around the streets of the big apple.
In this film, King Koopa (Dennis Hopper) is the humanoid descendant of a tyrannosaurus rex in another dimension, and he’s trying to obtain a special meteorite from the real world, which would help him merge both of the worlds together… or something. It’s all very complicated, it has little to do with the side-scroller that we know and love, and, frankly, it’s not very good.
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