Christmas-themed hits like Elf, Jingle All the Way, and The Polar Express were the norm for this time of year, but recent releases have withered in theatres. Sensing an opportunity to jump into the marketplace like Netflix and Apple, Amazon pushed out one of the biggest movie stars in the world, Dwayne Johnson, into a holiday flick. After years of watching streamers hoard films that should be in theatres, they released the wrong film into cineplexes with Red One. This vehicle, starring and produced by Dwayne Johnson, wants to be a new holiday classic but belongs on the naughty list.
Only days remain until Christmas Eve. Santa (J.K. Simmons) is in prime shape to deliver toys worldwide. Doing bench presses with North Pole Head of Security Callum Drift (Dwayne Johnson) hovering nearby, Santa appears in good spirits. It’s Callum who thinks about calling it quits; he doesn’t have the faith in people he used to. Santa disappears before his big night when the Christmas Witch (Kiernan Shipka) decides to shake Christmas up. Zoe (Lucy Liu) knows just who to hire. World-famous bounty hunter and level four naughty lister Jack O’Malley (Chris Evans, or is it Lucas Lee?).
Callum must team up with O’Malley, though he carries the confused cynic for the first two acts. O’Malley isn’t used to a world dominated by magic, so he spends a lot of time looking bewildered and shouting “What the hell!” at people. While O’Malley is confused, the studio hopes you got a good look at all the product placement onscreen.
Johnson and Evans slide into comfortable tropes of complete opposites who slowly gain trust in each other. To no surprise, they eventually reach a begrudging respect. Johnson dabbles in that subgenre a lot. If you’ve seen one of these mismatched partner stories, you’ve seen them all. What elevates those stories is quick-witted zingers or an engaging script. Red One has neither.
Red One suffers from needing to look cool when leaning into camp was possibly a better look. Simmons plays swole Santa—he goes by Nick because Santa is too embarrassing for a serious action film. Characters cringe when they say, “We have to save Christmas” or “They’ve taken the North Pole.” The jokes are forced at best, and when the comedy fails, the action doesn’t make up for it. As expensive as Red One is, the special effects are jarringly bad. Even ELF Agent Garcia/Polar Bear (Reinaldo Faberlle), who figures into much of the film, doesn’t always pass the eye test. The only impressive effect is the full-body prosthetic suit Kristofer Hivju wears as Krampus.
Given the talent behind the camera, director Jake Kasdan (Jumanji 2 & 3) and writer Chris Morgan (Fast & Furious series), you’d assume that Red One takes the mantle of globe-trotting adventure and runs with it. Unfortunately, no. The enthusiasm for those two franchises makes up for whatever implausible events occur. Here, the primary motivation appears to be the check. But where is the money when you look onscreen? Red One often resembles a video game where we watch Johnson battle horribly rendered snow henchmen.
Chris Evans has fun juxtaposing his uber-genuine Captain America image by playing sleazes of late. Yet O’Malley is no revelation like Ransom was in Knives Out. Johnson, on the other hand, looks to be having no fun at all. Yes, his stoic badasses are often quite similar, but there’s no energy to differentiate his North Pole enforcer from previous lacklustre characters. In contrast, Simmons has an absolute blast playing Santa Claus. I wish the film focused more on him and Bonnie Hunt as Mrs. Claus. Simmons doesn’t so much chew the scenery as lean into the fantastic possibilities of what being Santa Claus would be like. Rounding out the high-wattage cast is Lucy Liu, who dumps exposition and resides on the other side of the screen on FaceTime calls.
Cashing in on the everything-has-a-secret-underworld approach that made John Wick so popular, Red One lays the foundation for a franchise with its exploration of lore and mythology, but we likely won’t see future sequels. To make a sequel feasible, audiences must invest in those people onscreen, but the film sneers at genuine emotion at almost every opportunity. If you can’t lean into a bit of schmaltz in a Christmas movie, when can you?! Considering the only impactful scene is with Jack and his son Dylan (Wesley Kimmel), producers misjudged Red One and the tone it should have.
